The Sexual Double Standard: A Lock & Key Analogy

Lock and KeyFor a good part of my 48 years,  for one reason or another, I’ve heard examples of the double standard being applied to males and females.  Particularly when it comes to sexual morality, males have more freedom than females; but why?  This unwritten code of sexual behavior had never been explained to me as succinctly as it recently was by a 16-year-old high school student.

“It’s pretty easy to understand,” he told me, “like a lock and key.”

So here’s how he broke it down for me:

Let’s say you have a lock, and it can be opened by any old key you stick into it.  That’s a pretty shitty lock.

Then you have a key that can only open one lock. It’s okay, but not a great key.

But if you have a lock that can only be opened by one special key, that’s a damned good lock!

And if you have the key that can open just about any lock, well, that’s what you call a master-key!

I liked his analogy, and although I disagree with the double standard in many regards, this made sense to me.  Not that it’s fair, but when explained in terms of value, I get it.  Men recognize the power of a woman’s sexuality; and place great value on the woman who is disciplined and exercises some degree of restraint when it comes to satisfying her sexual urges.

So ladies, whether your lock has been opened by one key or one hundred, you still possess one of the world’s most coveted treasures.  You are the gatekeepers.  Choose wisely who you allow to access it, and remember that most men don’t respect or commit to women who open the gate for just anyone.  And to the men with the master keys, be careful about the locks you stick your key into.  Pandora’s box, when opened, released a multitude of sins.

Ketima Signature B

Thank you for taking a glimpse of the world through my eyes.  Enjoy the scenery!

PS. When it comes to sex, let’s all be selective.  Be responsible.  Be safe.


About Ketima Whitehall

Ketima Whitehall is the nom de plume of accountant and CTA Certified Life Coach Robin D. Aiken, a Silver Spring, Maryland native and Morgan State University alumna. In April, 2014 Ketima published her first fictional novel, Smoke and Mirrors - The Secret Life of a Cheater, which was loosely based on her personal experience with infidelity. After turning her relationship around, Ketima made it her goal to help as many people as possible avoid or overcome infidelity and find fulfillment in their romantic love relationships.
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